Part Deux Of The Challenge To Love

What an interesting day in my little corner of the world and as I was thinking about it on my way home from work I couldn't help but practice my new habit of being thankful - and today, I have a lot to be thankful for.

I was reading through all of the comments from my earlier post and couldn't help but laugh (I know, it's a SERIOUS situation) because of the irony of it all. What the enemy intended for evil, God literally threw it right back in his face(I love it when he does that). And I have some wonderful friends out there who are extremely generous with their encouragement and love - and that my friends is hope.

As I turned the final corner before reaching my house do you know what I saw? A rainbow. Seriously, a RAINBOW. It was like God just said 'Hey, I'm big, and loving, and here, and protective and I will take care of you. Always. I've got your back.' And you know what? There was an army of 'got your backers' out there today. I am so thankful for Sherri, Bo, Helen, Mare, KATDISH and Beth and all of the emails, and prayers and encouraging words. I felt an incredible amount of love being poured out and yes Bo, I did have a pretty awesome day! The really cool thing in all of this is that I have a circle of friends that extends clear to Africa and it just proves to me how little I am compared to the incredibly big God I serve.

The Challenge To Love

Today I was challenged in a way I have never been before and quite frankly, it stinks. I was told flat out by an individual, "I hate you". And to be honest, that is the first time that's happened and I hope it's the last. I could 'feel' the extreme degree to which it was meant as I read those three words and in my mind, I pictured the person as they were saying those incredibly hurtful words.

To me, a heart full of hate is the death of a heart. A heart full of hate can have no room for love, joy, peace or hope; four things that contribute to a truly abundant life. I am extremely saddened by this and for this person because the hate is like a cancer that has affected everyone in this persons life. Hate is the epitome of evil and when I think of what it does to one's heart and how it seeps out and destroys people, their lives and and those around them it's a sad realization that this world is full of this horrible thing - and it hit very close to home today.

I know from experience that it is easier to hate, be bitter and store up unforgiveness than it is to forgive and to love. And to be honest, in my extreme humanness, there was a part of me today that wanted to curse this person out of hurt. But I don't want to be like that again. I've dealt with some very harsh realities where unforgiveness and bitterness are concerned and learning to deal with it and give it to God is one of the best things I've ever done. For me, for my husband, for my children and all of those around me. I'm not 100% totally out of the woods so-to-speak, and I daily lay those things before God, but I recognize when I'm under attack and today was one of those times. I have come a long way and I'm not going back.

I know that the Bible says in Proverbs 10:12 - Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs. To me, living in love sounds so much better than living in hatred and I want all of the love I can get. I want to be greedy when it comes to love and I think God is OK with that because He's willing to give as much as we'll take. I pray that this person who is hurting will allow themselves to start being filled with love and learn to let go of the hate. I don't know if we'll ever make peace, I can only hope and pray. I do know that God is huge and bigger than this and no matter what he loves us both and I find an amazing amount of peace in that.

Don't Take it to the Grave

I had the privilege of taking my kids to Arlington National Cemetery last April and was able to watch the Changing of the Guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. I witnessed this ceremony as a young child, but as an adult I have much more appreciation and a tremendous amount of respect for the honorable men and women of our Armed Forces that guard the Tomb 24/7, 365 days per year in extreme heat and cold, rain, sleet or snow.

As we walked through the cemetery I was awed by the rows and rows of meticulously placed white tombstones - markers for those who have served our country and are laid to rest there. As I took in the sight I thought about how each tombstone represents a man or woman and that some gave their life serving their country while others served their country and went on to live their lives. Some were farmers, and teachers, carpenters, businessmen and women, nurses, doctors, and clergymen and each had their own story. Then I began to wonder how many of those buried in Arlington died with 'unfinished business' in their hearts. Who died with anger or contempt towards a brother or neighbor, un-forgiveness or bitterness towards their mother or father, an ex-spouse or 'used-to-be' friend? Who had let these things destroy their life and take away any hope for real, true happiness or joy that they might have experienced in life?

The other day I was saddened as I read an article about a couple from Brooklyn who were murdered in their home this past summer. What really struck me was the title “Bitter to the End – and Beyond”. Apparently they detested many in life, mainly members of their immediate family, and when they wrote their will, they allowed all of their bitterness to spew forth and literally filled it with all the hatred they had stored up. Now the whole world has knowledge of this and most likely this couple will be remembered not for the good they may have done, but for the will they left behind laced with acerbic words for their family. How sad that they chose for their last words to be hurtful, hateful and vengeful instead of forgiving and healing.

I don’t think this couple is any different than me or you or millions of others in the world. They are just as human and prone to allowing past hurts and resentments quench the true joy and happiness we can experience in life. Un-forgiveness is a slow death, like strapping the person we have issues with to our back and carrying them around until we crumble under the weight. It’s giving others control and power over us. If I can forgive, I’m essentially taking them off my back, freeing myself of the burden and not allowing them to control my life any longer. We should take the saying 'get off my back' literally!

I know as a Christian that I am called to love. Not just those that I like and get along with, but those that I don't like or those that say things about me or persecute me. God makes that very clear when he tells us in Romans 10:12 - Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. If I have bitterness, anger or un-forgiveness in my heart how can I do what God tells me to do – which is love others? If I can't forgive how can God forgive me? Mark 11:25 -And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. Living victoriously in Christ and loving others is dealing with our past hurts, anger and un-forgiving hearts and learning to love as Christ loves us. Its living Ephesians 4:31-3; Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

It's easier to be un-forgiving than forgiving. But, I don't want to go to my grave and not have taken full advantage of living victoriously in Christ and receiving all of the hope and joy that He has for me in my life. That would be cheating myself out of some pretty cool things I know God has for me.

Lovable vs Unlovable

My day started out today with the crushing realization, when I was moments from arriving at work that I left my brewed to perfection(yay Jon!) steaming hot to-go mug of coffee sitting on my kitchen counter. Since I refuse to do drugs, coffee is my addiction of choice and because I am obsessive compulsive about having my coffee in the mornings I had to make a pit-stop at Starbucks to get my fix. Isn't it funny how we let the small things like that rule us? So what happens when we let the big things rule us?

I think a big thing that rules us is not liking and loving people and I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I know several people that I don't like and really don't want to love and my crummy, prideful humanness has made it easier to not love than to love. It's easy to make excuses as to why I can't or won't do the one massively huge, seemingly impossible thing God tells me to do (love the unlovable).

For whatever reason, other people can just be mean, ridiculous, hurtful, spiteful, irritating and unforgiving. I've known people who finger point at me while throwing out bible verses and 'f-bombs' and that's using God as a weapon(is that when you move out of the way for fear of lightning strikes?). I've used all those things and more as an excuse to not love others and I was totally convicted of it this morning when I was reading my devotion. One thing in particular that caught my attention was, "the person we dislike is still a soul for whom Christ died." That is a whoa statement if I ever read one. I have been the receiver of much more of God's grace than I deserve and so have the one's I don't want to put an effort into loving. But to do any less than give my best at that seemingly impossible task would be to minimize the grace I've so graciously received.

God didn't say we get to pick and choose who we love, he made it very clear that we are to love those we find easy to love as well as our enemies (UGH!) and the not-so-lovable.