Sunday, May 31, 2009

NASCAR, Smokey Burnouts And A Garden

My house is totally silent right now. Everyone is gone and all I can hear are the trees moving in the wind as a storm threatens to blow in. I love the quiet times like these because I find much peace in the still moments of life.

It was quite a week that was full of ups and downs, drama, prom, reflections, disappointments, anticipation, stress, eye-rolling, laughter, tears, an exhausted dog and a mom who put her foot down. Let me just highlight a few.

**I know, it's hard to believe this extremely meek soul would dare to put her foot down, but I did. It has to do with a certain level of respect that I expect children (or anyone for that matter) to have when they are in the confines of my home, be it in person, or phone. Of course I won't go into details as to protect the 'innocent', but let me just say, there are some kids out there that need a good mouth washing.

**My kids have experienced a lot of disappointment in their lives. Not just normal kid-type disappointment, but real life tough-stuff disappointment. It has happened as divorce, parents not getting along, step-families that didn't blend very well, friends who haven't acted so friendly, a less-than patient mom at times, bad choices, bad grades and a cherry on top. My sister-in-law was sweet enough to remind me that the disappointments in life are never as big as the cover of grace that we have extended over us by a God who is really, really big. And now I'm really bummed that she is moving back to Virginia, because she is full of awesome advice like that. And I'll miss her.

**Last night was my daughter's prom and she looked pretty darn cute. So did her boyfriend. She told me the best part of the evening was coming home and her and Kyle sitting around, listening to three adults tell crazy stories about a 95 Caprice and smokey burnouts. Yes, we know how to show kids a good time.

**Teenagers. Drama. Need I say more?

**Teenagers. Eye-rolling. Need I say more?

**My brother and his family are heading back to Virgina(the one with 12 kids...and counting) and we are really going to miss them. We got the whole gang together, played some wiffle ball, had a BBQ and discussed the audacity of the person who suggested that NASCAR remove the Confederate flag. Telling NASCAR to remove the Confederate flag is like suggesting the Dukes of Hazard drive a ford Pinto (yes, I purposely didn't capitalize the 'f' word. I'm a Chevy girl.)

**I am in extreme anticipation that this is going to be the best year of gardening yet. I've currently got 25 potato plants that have popped up, some rogue carrots going strong and hopefully I should see some lettuce, spinach, onions, cukes, zucchini, squash, pumpkins and radishes peek through any day now. Oh yeah, and beans.

I know it's short, but it's Sunday and the rain is starting to fall. To me, that's a good show to watch, so I'm going to go sit under cover of the deck and enjoy the spring rain as it works it's magic on my garden. Grow little seeds, grow!

Friday, May 29, 2009

Rolling Thunder, Lighting Strikes And The Downpour

When I was a kid I loved thunder and lightning storms and when the downpour came it was even better. We used to say that 'God is moving furniture around' whenever the thunder clapped.

My dad grew up in Akron, Ohio and if you haven't experienced rain on east coast you've never truly experienced a storm. OK, maybe Ohio isn't 'east coast', but it's a lot farther east than Oregon and from Ohio to Georgia the rainstorms are pretty ferocious. Yes, I'm speaking from experience because I experienced the same type of storms while living in Virginia and Georgia.

Every few years we would go back to Akron to visit my grandma. 175 Casterton Avenue. It's crazy that I even remember that, but I do. I can remember everything about pulling up to the house, how it looked (painted white with green trim), how it smelled, the old plumbing and heaters, the apartment that grandma rented out and who rented it, and being in my dad's old bedroom that he shared with his brother growing up and wondering if it ever cooled off in the summer on the third story. I also remember the street and how it was lined with huge buckeye trees. And the lightning bugs. We don't have those in Oregon (we'd literally have to light a bug on fire to do that, and I'm not handling a bug long enough to set the things butt on fire.) Us kids would get a mason jar and catch the bugs in the jar then go into a dark room so we could watch them light up.

On this particular visit, when I was seven years old, we went to visit some friends of my parents who had a dairy farm somewhere in the rolling hills of Ohio. My parents had met Lee and Joy when they moved to Oregon and became friends, but circumstances took Lee and Joy back to Ohio.

I had never been on a dairy farm and when we pulled up it was getting close to milking time. The dairy consisted of an old white, two-story farmhouse, acres of green pasture and a milking barn. Lee came out to call the cows (he actually yodeled for them) and pretty soon, the cows came in from over the rolling hills of pasture. For us kids (it was me and two older brothers) it was a huge adventure and while the milking was done with machines, Lee wanted each of us kids to milk a cow the old fashioned way. How hard do you think three non-farming kids can giggle about that?

What I remember most, and what my family still talks about to this day is the storm. Thunder. Lightning. Rain like crazy. I actually remember the smell before the storm. That breeze that blows in a rain smell. I remember the lightning lighting up the old farmhouse bedroom, the white curtains blowing like crazy and my mom coming in to close the windows and check on us kids. I don't remember being afraid, but being in awe of something so powerful, something I'd never experienced before.

In the morning, the sun came up, the breeze was still, Lee yodeled for the cows, and they came over the hill to be milked.

As I sit here and listen to the thunder and feel the breeze blowing the rain smell through the office, I can't help but be taken back to the dairy farm in Ohio...

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

In Living Color

My weekend was pretty darn good. There were a few downs, but for the most part, the weather was wickedly awesome, the wildlife was in living color, the RV was better than Motel 6 (and I know the sheets were clean - cause that always freaks me out about hotels), the stump made a smokin' hot fire and God put me in check. I thought I'd share some of the highlights, with commentary (of course) of my weekend. I know you're all waiting with abated breath.

Dog, you're going for a swim because it amuses me (check out Boz's face), but him, not so much.

Holy mackerel! It's a life-size chia pet.

Reenactment of the 'Dove that Noah sent out'.

Oh good heavens Jon, yes, I'm in a fog. I'm still on my first cup for Pete's sake. (And check out what Boz thinks of the whole deal. Yes, he's really doing that.)

Dog, I am so coming after you. (yes, Boz headed for the deer, but when she put her head down and started coming after him....)




(Seriously. We just heard this crunching sound, the chipmunk was taking no prisioners and then he took off with the bone. Dude...)

Can you believe that the gal who has worked at the lake for years has only seen one otter?

And we saw all three (click on the picture to check out those choppers!)...

Yes, sometimes I just am this happy.

Because of this...

And this....

And it's where I find peace.

I hope you all had an awesome weekend!


Thursday, May 21, 2009

Bring on the Weekend

As I mentioned last week, Jon and I will be spending the week in our castle on wheels out in the woods. In case you can't remember, this is what we will be staying in.

I know you all are probably very jealous at my artistic flair for flower arranging, and the fact that I have a SPAM shirt and you don't. I know. How kewl is that.

The place we're going is pretty darn awesome. Actually, this is it:

And if we're lucky, we may see one of these from the window of the RV:

But then maybe not because I have one of these:

Whatever the case, I'm excited for the long weekend and am anticipating God's blessings while I'm away. I hope you have a very safe and awesome weekend!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

That Pansie Isn't A Sissy But Boz May Be

I spent yesterday in the trenches. Potato trenches that is. The folks came over and we spent the morning digging trenches and planting potatoes and we even planted some cabbages. These are the only things that will survive the frost that will no doubt plague me sometime around June 26th. I have learned from experience NOT to plant sissy vegetables that can't handle a little ice, because then I just have to re-plant. So, sorry zucchini, squash, tomatoes...while I dearly love you, it's just not time yet for you to be a part of my garden family.

When I garden, I really get into it. I mean REALLY into it. Like I don't wear shoes to garden. I wear flips. (I was going to say thongs, but then 'someone' would've made an inappropriate comment *ehem* and insinuated I'm out in the dirt in just a thong or something.) I usually end up covered head to toe in dirt. I'm not sure how it happens, but I guess I'm the PigPen of gardening.

So, here's the garden. It looks a little sad right now, but eventually the sunflowers will be lining the fence and I'll have a sea of green going on. It will be wicked awesome for sure.

I also got some flowers planted, bushes trimmed, threw down some seed in the bare spots... you know, stuff I should've done in the fall but was too lazy to do. The yard is looking pretty good.

And notice the dark green spot? Jon thought it would be funny to spray paint the yellow patches. Uh, wrong shade of green, honey.

Oh, and those little yellow 'flowers' (aka Dandelions), they should be very afraid for their life. I am coming after you and you are going down!

This may look like just an ordinary pot with dirt, but make no mistake. This is going to be one awesome basil plant. (I have to plant it in a pot so I can bring it in at night. Basil falls under the 'sissy' category, if you know what I'm sayin'.)

And you know what this is? (Besides a pretty kewl picture.) Apple blossoms. You know what that means? Venison. Yep, food for all the stinkin' deer that come into my yard, eat my prized roses and poop all over the place. Good thing Killian has his hunting license.

And this little guy, this is a pansie. You know what is so ironic about the pansies? They aren't sissy flowers. They can actually handle the frost. Touche.

And of course, the Boz Dog with the pansies. Funny thing is, he kind of is a pansie. But he's a happy one and is worth a good laugh. Oh yeah, and he's kind of cute. (Jon entered him in an online dog contest. I'm sure he'll win.)

So, I'm dirty, my shoulders are red, it's hot(t) outside, which means I'm hot (but not with two t's), and I'm tired. Actually, I kind of feel like this:

And Boz didn't even do anything but sit on the porch in the shade...

I think I'm going to go finish my book (I'm reading The Dark Tide by Andrew Gross...really good) and maybe enjoy a cold juan (that's how Jon refers to a beer). I hope everyone had a spectacularly enjoyable weekend and I'll cya on the blogs.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Things I Observed This Week

I am glad that the week for me is over. I have a great job with lots of vacation and so I save it all up for the end of the year (our year is July to June) and start taking 3-day weekends in May and then a week or two in June. I really need the extra time off this week. I'm brain dead, heart dead, joy dead and dead tired. Sometimes life just goes that way. We all know life just stinks sometimes, we get some stuff figured out (or not) and keep trudging along. It's all part of the adventure I suppose.

I started a gazillion posts this week, but couldn't seem to get the words from the heart to the head to the fingers...and finally last night just gave up trying to finish anything. So this is what you get. It's kind of like left over mashed potatoes and creamed corn. While they are really good the first night, maybe not so much the next. Really, if I could, I'd give you left over lasagna, because we all know it's better the next day, but I just can't seem to get it done. So here is my lame attempt at giving you something.

1. If you are going to hire a sign company to make signs for your business, they should probably know basic spelling rules. (like 'drop the e, add ing') Yes, this is an actual sign, on the side of an actual building, that houses and actual business that makes money in Bend. Seriously.

2. Believing that you are not worth receiving God's love and grace is like calling God a liar.

3. The first step is usually pretty tricky in the dark. Turn on the lights.

4. When a child is devastated because they feel depressed, alone and rejected it is the most hopeless feeling in the world.

5. People who appear tough on the outside are usually the mushiest on the inside.

6. I really hate meth(and drugs in general) and it is a huge problem in this town. So when a dealer is busted and a 'family member' anonymously says this about them: 'He had no addiction to anything but trying the only way he knows how to put a roof over his familys head" I want to love them the best way I know how and smack them upside their head. (Yeah, right... he's selling to/ruining/killing our kids so he can feed his kids. I will so Zena-love that dude if he crosses my path.)

7. Next weekend I will be staying in my RV with Jon up in the mountains by a lake. This is the actual RV, sitting in my backyard. While I may appear to be 'hip and all-that', I am a redneck girl at heart. What can I say. (Yes, that is a Corona bottle with one of my prized roses in it. And a Spam t-shirt. Mock me if you must.) (click on photo to see a larger picture)

8. I find I am kind of irritated by those who loudly preach tolerance but only tolerate those who think/believe like them.

9. Every once in awhile I crack myself up. I think we all need that sometimes. Even if we don't crack anyone else up.

10. These are the most comfortable shoes I own. And I happen to think they're pretty cool (they're VANS for Pete's sake). I have walked miles in these shoes. But while I may be comfortable in my shoes, it doesn't necessarily mean that I am comfortable in my life.

While I understand that the words in my post may not be ultra-encouraging, let me leave you with some that are:

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you, declares the Lord, and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile. (Jeremiah 29:11-14).

**As a side note to my blog friends, I have been super busy at work and by the time I get home I am exhausted. I try to read your posts but don't always comment. Just know that while I may be silent on the blogs, I think about y'all daily.

I hope you all have an awesome weekend.

Monday, May 11, 2009

What He Said

My friend Sherri threw down a challenge to all of her blog buds and it goes something like this: Ask your spouse to answer honestly several 'loaded' questions about yourself and call it a good time. I have been putting it off because I was feeling overly insecure and slightly moody last week and was afraid of how Jon would answer the questions (I don't know why, because it's not like he's going to be a jerk about it - he's not like that). But last night I finally worked up the courage to ask Jon these questions. (When I told him what we were doing I think the words 'Uh-Oh' came out of his mouth.)

It was actually pretty funny, enlightening, and surprisingly, I learned a few things I didn't know. The cool thing is that there were no hurt feelings or ruffled feathers by the time we got through the questions. Just some wicked-crazy laughing going on. And as Sherri has requested I am going to write down the actual answers. I apologize in advance in case I offend anyone. Just sayin'.

What is my comfort food?
Jon: Mexican
Anne: No big shocker there.

If money were no object, where would I go on vacation?
Jon: A remote place in Mexico.
Anne: You know me so well.

How do I feel about housework?
Jon: Get it done.
Anne: Yeah. I'm kind of a neat freak Ninja that way.

What is my least favorite household chore?
Jon: I don't know. Laundry or dusting maybe?
Anne: Laundry? I am like Zena when it comes to battling laundry. But dusting...I hate dusting....

What brings me the most joy?
Jon: Mexico
Anne: (thinking to myself) Ok, I am not going to get 'Mother of the Year' because he didn't say 'your kids' and now I appear to be all about myself. But if my kids were with me in Mexico that would bring me great joy. Good recovery (bowing and blowing kisses as I accept my award).

I have a Saturday night without any commitments. How do I spend it?
Jon: Eating Tacos al Carbon at El Caporal.
Anne: I'm beginning to see a recurring theme here...

What is my greatest gift?
Jon: Your heart.
Anne: My heart? What do you mean?
Jon: Where your heart is.
Anne: Oh, ok (shaking my head yes and acting like I really get what he's saying).

What is my greatest talent?
Jon: (smirks) That thing with the flip.
Anne: (starts laughing) The thing with the flip?
Jon: Yeah. The flip thing.
Anne: Oh good lord.

What do I enjoy doing the most?
Jon: (smirks..then laughs...) That thing with the flip.
Anne: (laughing) Hmmm...I have to be honest and post these answers you know.
Jon: That's what you said.
Anne: That's what she said.

What is my greatest fear?
Jon: Failure of any kind.
Anne: Yeah, I'm not a gracious failure. (*thinking* This may be a wrong answer. I will be condemned because it's not 'something bad happening to my children'.)

What is my biggest pet peeve about others?
Jon: DTP
Anne: Wha...?
Jon: You know, DTP. Democratic Thought Process
Anne: Wha...?
Jon: (giving me the 'duh' look) You know, democratic views, thinking like a liberal. DTP.
Anne: (*thinking* Crap. I have friends who are Democrats that are going to know their views annoy me.) So, not like arrogance or dishonesty or something like that?
Jon: (Giving me 'the look')
Anne: Ok, DTP...

What is my favorite book of the bible?
Jon: Uh...Psalms or Proverbs?
Anne: I like Psalms.
Jon: Psalms is like the fluffy-girly book and Proverbs is like the 'guy-book'.
Anne: I avoid Proverbs, especially Proverbs 31 because I can't live up to being that woman.
Jon: Then stick to Psalms.
Anne: You are a wise man.

What do I hate most about my body?
Jon: Well...(starts talking like a southern Billy Bob) you talk about your fat buuuuutt, your fat belly and your flaaaab handles.
Anne: (laughing hysterically)
Jon: (laughing hysterically but guy-hysterically, not girl-hysterically)

What is my best feature?
Jon: Your heart.
Anne: Smiling. (*thinking* Good answer. He's lucky he didn't say my teeth.)

What is my most annoying habit?
Jon: (long silent pause)
Anne: Uh, honey, I know it's a tough decision but you only have to choose one.
Jon: Uh, that Hungarian food chomp thing you do.
Anne: What? I chomp my food?
Jon: Yeah.
Anne: Like this? (makes very quiet chomping noise)
Jon: No, more like this (makes louder chomping noise).
Anne: Like all the time?
Jon: Uh...not all the time.
Anne: It's probably just when I'm really hungry. (*thinking* Great, Jon has a lovely hearted wife that eats like a pig.)
Jon: Umm...not necessarily.
Anne: Oh. (*thinking* Note to self: quit eating like an annoyingly oinktakular pig.)

What do you like best about me?
Jon: The whole thing.
Anne: What do you mean?
Jon: There's not one single thing. It's the package. Everything adds up to one thing - the whole package.
Anne: Ohhh...I like that answer. (Big smile and showing my very nice, white, straight teeth.)
Anne: I really chomp my food?

Ok, that last question was not on the original list, but I just threw it in there to see what he'd say. I'm tricky that way. It was such a great answer I gave him some bonus points.

So who's next?

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mother's Day Mom

Today is Mother's Day and I will be celebrating this day by taking my very awesome mom to breakfast. A few of the reasons why I think my mom is the best are:

* She has a huge heart for others.

* She can grow a mean flower garden.

* She makes the best tulip bouquets.

* She isn't afraid to go on mission trips to places like Turkey (where she got everyone arrested), Libya, Palestine and she even considered Beirut and Iraq.

* She loves, loves, loves her family.

* We are best friends and talk to each other nearly every day.

* She's a home-cooking type cook. Yum.

* She forgives.

* She is a woman of God.

* She's been married to dad (who's a darn spectacular guy) for over 45 years.

* She is kind and extremely generous.

I've learned a lot from my mom and we truly have a great relationship and enjoy spending time together. So Happy Mother's Day mom. I love you mucho.

And to all the mom's out there, Happy Mother's Day. Thanks for making a difference in all you do.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Things I Observed This Week

It's Friday and I'm off to the valley to listen to my daughter's high school choir sing at a college. (For those of you who don't know what 'the valley' is, it's a very wet place about three hours from my house. It constantly rains (or so it seems). They have greener grass than we do over here in the mountains, but I'll take sun over green grass any day.) It's been a crazy week and I'm anticipating the three day weekend, so-to-speak. Maybe I'll finally be able to catch up on my blog reading/commenting/twittering/Facebook. I know you all are missing my extremely deep, enlightening, humorous and sometimes sarcastic comments. Ok, probably not as much as I think.

To get the weekend started, I thought I'd share with you some things I observed this week.

1. I really do have kewl blog friends who know how to do up a birthday the right way. I had more hits (on my blog people...on my blog) than ever before and a lot of total strangers just stopped in to give me a big ol' happy birthday. How awesome is that.

2. I realized I am my own worst critic and that it's a habit I need to break.

3. During the jury duty selection process you can not yell 'I object your honor' while being questioned by the lawyer.

4. Tequila is either really good or really bad. There is no in between.

5. Love IS buying your spouse a new coffee grinder. (OK, it was probably because he didn't want to hear me talk mean to the old one anymore.)

6. It is not a good idea, during jury selection, to state your name and the words 'I grow pot' in hopes of getting out of jury duty.

7. I think Jimmy was right when he said, 'love doesn't conquer all.'

8. Having Honey Bunches of Oats in the house at all times helps to avoid conflict.

9. My mom makes the best strawberry/rhubarb crisp. Period. (You can argue this one with me all you want but you will not win.)

10. God isn't finished with me yet.

Have a fab-o Friday and folks, I am outta here.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Birthday Love IS Awesome

So today is my birthday and if you roam around in my blogosphere you would probably have guessed it by now. Let's just say that when I checked my blog email this morning (BEFORE work) I was pretty dang tickled by what I saw.

All of my bloggity buds had done Happy Birthday posts on their blogs, and encouraged all of their readers to come over to my blog to wish me happy birthday. Of course the most recent post I'd done was absolutely ridiculous so if they were a 'first-timer' hopefully they didn't do the click and dash. In the words of Stacy "Don't you love having your virtual birthday party on a post about the swine flu?"

Sherri was also out shamelessly telling all of the SCL'ers to come over here and wish me happy birthday. She's cool that way. I'm still waiting for Prodigal Jon to show up. Ehem. It's the least he could do.

I did get Big Al and Bob. I think they're normally lurkers, but today they did what their wives told them to do and came over to wish me HB. How cool is that. And I'm sure they would've done it without their wives telling them to. That's just the kind of guys they are.

Katdish even said some lovely things, and got her dog to pose in what would probably be given an NC-17 rating. But everything was covered by a birthday card so it's all good.

Helen was a shout out warrior this morning, posting on the three blogs she contributes to. Wow. And Candy, Beth, Marni, Steph...

So to all my totally awesome bloggity buds who threw me the biggest blog party I could've hoped for, you rock. No, really, you ROCK! And to all those I've never met who stopped by to wish me a happy birthday, I am extremely humbled that you would take time out of your busy day for a complete stranger. I mean how cool is that?

So, to celebrate my birthday, and because it just happens to be Cinco de Mayo and I love all things Mexican, excuse me while I go enjoy a Pacifico and lime.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Ways You Can Contribute To The Panic Surrounding Swine Flu

The Swine Flu - or H1N1 as it is now being called is a serious thing. While any death from this is tragic, I can't help but be amazed at the panic surrounding this virus. Government agencies and news medias seem to be fueling an ever-growing fire by suggesting that we not travel to 'certain' places, cover our mouths when we sneeze or cough and stay home if we're sick. The latter two are common sense and have an extremely high 'duh' factor. Schools and universities are closing and Oregon now has FIVE confirmed cases of Swine Flu. It appears the pandemic of epic proportions has reached even us.

While the government and news medias are already doing a fine job of creating panic, I thought I would suggest a few ways that we citizens of this great nation can do our part in contributing as well.

1. Wear a pig snout while doing your grocery shopping and when it's your turn at the checkout, tell the cashier that everyone is looking at you strange and ask if you have a booger hanging from your nose.

2. While in a crowded restaurant play some banjo music and start squealing like a pig.

3. When loading up your plate at the salad bar, cough loudly and snort like a pig after each cough.

4. Get a can of Lysol, put a mask on your face and run down the street, spraying the Lysol can behind you and yell over and over, 'Make them stop! Make them stop chasing me! The pigs are chasing me! Make them stop!'

5. Order your grande latte using snorts and squeals. Then act disgusted when they can't understand what you want.

6. Drag a leash behind you, stopping every-so-often and give the command to 'sit'. When you catch your neighbor looking at you strangely tell them you're training you're pet pig.

7. Tell the pharmacist you have a pig-tail sprouting and inquire as to whether this is a side-effect of the SF.

8. Load up your shopping cart with Lysol, alcohol, masks and Purell and then if you see anyone else with those items in their cart, grab it out of their cart and run.

9. Go to a crowded park, and start running around, ducking wildly and yelling 'those blasted pigs are dive bombing me!'

10. Go about your life and ignore the panic.

Ok, those are absolutely ridiculous but so are Heidi and Spencer. I think some common sense is probably what the doctor would prescribe.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Things I Observed This Week

I'm glad it's Friday and here's what I observed (or possibly learned) this week:

1. I am incredibly ready for summer and officially sick of snow.

2. When I come back from Mexico I should tell everyone about the pigs I came in contact with and cough a lot just to see what kind of panic it causes. (No, I'm not going to Mexico, but if I were...)

3. Joe Biden should not be allowed to speak in public. EVER. In fact, they should probably fly him to an uninhabited island and leave him there for 4 years.

4. When I receive emails from condescending, arrogant sales people I want to throw Dale Carnegie under the bus and Annie rant them. (I'll probably see that on my next review.)

5. I'm sure the clerks who stock shelves at Safeway continuously move the Velveeta around to different places just to mess with me.

6. When I'm driving I say, 'what the heck?', a lot.

7. Cream of Tartar comes from the wine making dregs. Who knew?

8. I contemplate my purpose in life way too much.

9. I am apparently missing out on another dimension of life because I'm a twitter-slacker.

10. Pete Shut-Up is getting old. (Who is Pete Shut-up?)

11. I've been holding at 17 followers forever. Apparently I'm not reaching the masses.

12. A bottle of wine goes too fast around 3 women. Where's the 'water into wine' miracle when you need it?

13. If you buy the package that says 'pocketless pita bread' they probably mean it. Do not be disappointed when you slice the bread and find no pockets.

14. If the old bread is still in the bird feeder after a week, there's a good chance the birds prefer that I stick to bird seed.

15. That I need to practice my aim with the pellet gun. (Oh, yeah, watch out dirty dogs.)

I hope you all have a fabulous Friday. I am going to go make some homemade mac n' cheese and anticipate the weekend. Maybe I'll do some target practice....